You’re worth it
Three months ago, I cut off a relationship that felt impossible to leave behind. Shortly after, I ran into this person at yoga and finished class by crying down the streets of Wan Chai all the way back to Soho (that’s a 40-minute stroll across Hong Kong).
I took this video (below) to remind myself just how low I felt and to never again allow anyone, especially me, to make me feel invaluable and undeserving.
It’s so easy to share our joy, happiness and success with the world. And it’s so easy to hyper-focus on the “good” that the world sometimes looks too perfect like Barbie Land. But part of being human is to feel fully. Just remember, you are damn worth it and never let anyone make you second guess yourself.
Only my closest confidants know that I tried to take my life last year. I’ve never felt that low. Yeah, it’s not something I’m proud of but I took a lot of lessons away from it. I’m grateful for the relationship because it was one of my greatest teaching moments. Life is too goddamn beautiful and precious to just give it all up, or maybe worse, squander it away.
It’s crazy because that felt like a lifetime ago. I like to think it’s because of how much I’ve grown and how I try to live each day as if it were my last. The rest of the footage was taken at the wedding of my dearest two friends one month after I cried down the streets. No drugs, no alcohol. Pure joy. We were celebrating love, something we need to cherish in a world that has become so cold.
Part of why I’m also sharing this is because I see so many people suffering and withdrawn. We’ve been conditioned to feel fine when we’re not. We don’t want to open up because we don’t want to feel vulnerable. Maybe that’s part of the problem. We think everyone is out to get us. But deep down, I think we all reach for love, not just in the romantic sense but as family, friends and community.
The day I cried down the streets, I ran into a friend who just held me in his arms for an incredibly long moment of silence. We didn’t speak much after and continued down our separate ways. That hug and presence was all I needed.
I hope we can learn to be more present and open with each other. We are species that love love. Go out there and live your life. Hug your loved ones. Hug a stranger. Connect with the greatness out there but don’t be taken advantage of. Love and be kind. ❤️
